My See-Saul Heart

Here is a nugget of humility I dug out of my devotions today.

Growing up in church and attending bible college and seminary etched in my memory the adventurous stories of the Old Testament. I read them again now with a sense of fondness, as if God has given me special information so that I anticipate every twist of the plot, as if I’m better than the character and would have seen the disastrous consequences around the corner of decision.

This was exactly my attitude while finishing 1 Samuel. I should join a Bible quiz team, so when they ask questions like, “Who’s the biggest underachiever in 1 Samuel?” I’d pop up and answer, “Saul, of course, because he threw away the kingdom.” And then they’d ask, “Who’s described as the man after God’s own…?” No need to finish. I’ve got the answer to that one too. “David was the man after God’s own heart.” I’ve been to enough Bible college chapels to know that we ought to have a heart like David, the most prolific Psalm writer, the one who would not lift his had to kill Saul, the Lord’s anointed (He killed a lot of other people, so something special must of stopped him), the one whose line would bring the Redeemer into the world. But when I read 1 Samuel today, God said something fresh to me…and maybe to you.

Take time to read 1 Samuel 13 in the NIV. Go ahead…I’ll wait. No, really! I’ll wait… Are you done? If you're cheating, God doesn't like cheaters and his Word is 100% more important and meaningful than mine.

The Philistines where gathering like dark, scary storm clouds (vs. 5), the troops were so afraid they looked for any hole to hid in (vs. 6), some even swam across the Jordan (vs. 7). And when Saul thought nothing could get worse the preacher Samuel forgot to show up! (vs. 8) So because Saul new his only hope of victory was God he offered a quick sacrifice to “earn” God’s favor – kind of like some our quickie prayers. 1 Samuel 13:11b-12 explains his rationale to Samuel, “ And Saul said, ‘When I saw that the people were scattered from me, and that you did not come within the days appointed, and that the Philistines gathered together at Michmash, ¹² then I said, 'The Philistines will now come down on me at Gilgal, and I have not made supplication to the LORD. Therefore I felt compelled, and offered a burnt offering. ” Samuel says, “Nope, it doesn’t matter how compelled you were. You disobeyed God’s commandment, and here is your punishment: “ N ow your kingdom shall not continue. The LORD has sought for Himself a man after His own heart, and the LORD has commanded him to be commander over His people.”

When I read 1 Samuel today, God told me I have a heart like Saul. What kind of heart do you have? Did you feel any compassion for Saul? Is there a little something deep in your soul that whispers, “Why did God do that? What happened to Saul just isn’t fair?” You want to know why your heart says this? The answer is because you have a heart like Saul, too.

I guess my point is that as much as I want to have a heart like David, I really have a heart like Saul. Many things life may bring my way seem overly harsh or undeserved. The truth is nothing I’ve done, no leadership I’ve shown, or degree I’ve earned makes me redeemable even though my heart says I’m worthy.

Sure makes me thankful for words like these:

Ephesians 2:8-9 "For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is a gift of God, not of works lest anyone should boast."